to whom it may concern,

just another quick little question…

when your eyes start to blur a bit…at the words on a page…or the food on your plate…or the itty bitty pictures on those hand-held devices your kids hold up in front of your face…

how…exactly…do you shave your armpits?

i mean…all of those other things can be held back to (at least) your arm’s length!

but how are we supposed to see something we just can’t get any further away from our face?!?

do we just wear our glasses right into the shower?

i mean…wouldn’t they just fog right up and leave you right back where you started?

with a now-not-just-blurry-but-all-completely-fogged-up armpit?

i mean…hairs?  how can i possibly see individual hairs when my whole armpit is blurry?!?

my attempt this last time was “patchy”…at best…

some all shaved off…some half-way through…and still some left entirely intact…

just taunting!

but i was only able to actually see this sad state of my pits after i’d already emerged from the shower…and shoved one right up close for inspection in the magnifying cosmetic mirror!

(oh, how i do hate this chore!)

so…

my dilema has just left me bewildered…and wondering…

if he’s (mostly) the one who appreciates my armpits all naked…

would it really be all that naughty…

if i was to just offer up my shaver…along with my patchy-hairy pits…to him?

yeah…maybe just a bit…

does any one have any wisdom to share?

‘cause this girl’s just this blurry close to once-and-for-all throwing out her shaver…and keeping her arms now-and-forever-down-at-her-sides pinned!

very sincerely,
me

p.s.

i did wage war on that whisker…and then it simply called in recruits!!!

oh, 40…whatever shall i do with you!