trust and obey

this morning, everyone else went on to fellowshipexcept for that littlest little man and me

he’s been struggling so much as of late…trying to decide whether or not he can truly trust his daddy and me…

to trust that our will for him is good…is best

and all he need do is obey

so there’s been lots of hot, angry tears…and lots of “no!” screamed from him…

and lots of (sometimes) weary-and-tired-of-sticking-to-it discipline from his daddy and me…

poor little man

and this sweet little song from my sunday school days keeps coming back to me…

a little song sung so often when i was his age

trust and obey…for there’s no other way…
to be happy in Jesus…but to trust and obey.”

how essential that is!  for himand for me!

this lesson never entirely learned!

this same lesson that He is so oftenand faithfully…working out in me…and disciplining me through!

that He can be trusted!  that His will is goodand best!

that all i need do…is to just let go

to just abide

to just surrender my will to His

to simply trust and obey

9-15-13

– our dear “teacher dorothy”…who taught so many wonderful hidden-way-down-deep-in-my-heart songs to me!  (circa 1979)

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dear honey,

i love this day

this day that rolls around each year…and catches you up to me

when i don’t have to be anymore “older” than you!

9-12-13 - b - robert

happy birthday, baby!

i love you!

and i’m so glad…that if this getting older is such an inevitable thingi at least get to do it with you!

– my honey’s one-year picture…his 1 + 40!

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::  there’s a little person right across the hall that should’ve been asleep an hour and a half ago…but i hear him in there singin’ to himself…

“ah, ah, ah, ah…stayin’ alive, stayin’ alive!”

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#22

pretending that the thermostat doesn’t say what it says…

and building just a smidge of a fire in the hearth…

9-9-13

just big enough

for that “just one s’more a piece”

the chocolate and grahams and mallows that never actually got eaten while on our retreat!

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9-7-13

gray’s river mornings

– hannah’s image

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when he just won’teven for the love of all that is good and holystop movin

9-5-13

there’s always “movers”!

– hannah’s image

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#21

making our “goin’ to gray’s river” grocery list…

9-2-13

done!

well…almost

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stuck

lately, i sit down here…hoping to loose some of these too-many-swirling words inside of my head…

and i rest my fingers down on these keys…and just stare at this blank space

and i wonder…if i could somehow just start tapping away…maybe some of these words would just somehow fall out of their tips

right out of my head, through these fingers and onto this space

but it just doesn’t seem to be working that way

these fingers of mine…try as hard as they might…just can’t seem to get these words to drain out…

and so they just swirl…somehow just so utterlystuck

and my fingers just rest here on these keys…

and i just wait

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on this day in…

~ 1997 ~

8-28-13

island days

ohthat day

what i wouldn’t give to go back to that day…just for a bit

to plant myself on an obliging drift log and just watch those boys explore that island all over again…

those boysnow all grown

those “big” boy cousins…when they weren’t any bigger than these crazy “little” boy cousins are now…

them loving it there ever-as-much as i did when i was that big…when their papa and nana started taking we three

and then when we were all grown…papa and nana, we (married) three and all of our (so far) littles…making those end-of-summer treks so many memorable times…

and thenfor 21…him and me holing up there for that five glorious days

and now…another full circlethat boy o’ mine planning a trip back there again…

back to explore that island…and reminisce…“just him”

‘round and ‘round…circle after circle

this life always rolling on forward

always picking up speed the further it goes

and yet somehow…sometimes…one rolling-forward circle comes full ‘round…and dips back…even if just a bit…into the full circle just before it…

hills being rolledislands being exploredHis story being told!

this blessed dipping back in, all the while still moving forward

and me…just (ever-still) sometimes…wishing i could just circle…all the way back…and around once again!

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#20

watching them roll down the “hill”…

that…once upon a (long-ago) timegrammy rolled…

and that…once upon a (not-too-long-ago) time…their daddy rolled…

and that now…all our kids…

8-26-13

these crazy boys and their crazy cousins

get to roll down any ol’ time!

and just getting to spend it…this day…

just…together

their sweet mama and me

– thanks to my honey for quick-snapping this image between their rolls down the hill!

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